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Perhaps I should have titled this post, “Pippi On My Penis” but aside from pushing the boundaries of good taste, some of you might not get the reference to “Pippi Longstocking”, the eponymous star of the series of children’s books by Swedish author Astrid Lindgren.
In any event, this past Thursday, I wrapped up ten surprisingly lovely days with a young lady we’ll call “Pernilla”, whom I first met in September, in London, when I was conducting a Speed Seduction® seminar.
She had come as the guest of a guest, a German fellow from a “seduction lair” in Berlin, who in turn had been invited by some local London pick-up/seduction gurus, whom I had invited.
One of the first things I noticed about her, aside from her Nordic good looks, was that she was quite strong-willed. Unlike 90% of my female guests, she steadfastly refused to come to the front of the room for me to demonstrate some techniques. In any case, even from her spot in the very back of the room, seated right next to the German guy, I was clearly getting to her: I could see her blushing beet-red when I directed my attention to her.
So it only came as a mild surprise when I checked my email the evening the seminar had concluded, and saw that she had sent me a message--quite cleverly incorporating one of the “indirect compliment” strategies I had taught the guys that very day, along with her phone number.
We made arrangements for her to meet me at the hotel the following evening, and after half an hour over a beer, I simply walked to the elevator and she followed. That’s when I first discovered this girl was quite more than I could have expected.
As soon as the elevator door closed, she said, “Why do you think I’m here? Do you think I came here just to fuck you?”
Now, not to brag, but I’ve been with LOTS of women. Some direct, some not so direct. But in my entire amorous career, I’ve never had any lady lay it on the line (no pun intended) quite so quickly or directly, much less a girl ten days shy of turning 19!
“Well, Pernilla” I replied. “I’m not sure why you’re here. But I am sure I only want to do what feels comfortable for us both. So why don’t we find out what that is?”
Note to potential seducers: I meant what I said to the lovely Ms. P. I really do only want to do what is comfortable for us both. But notice that my response is also very vague: I don’t mention what it is we’ll both find comfortable, so it leaves open virtually any possibility, without creating any pressure. What I’ve found that women usually mean, without being able to voice it clearly is, “Hey, I want to fuck you silly, but please don’t make me feel pressured or feel like a slut.”
I won’t get into details of what happened once we reached the privacy of my room except to say Pernilla truly surprised me with both her enthusiasm and genuine “talents”. Her only response to my curiosity about her skills was, “I’m a natural”.
Indeed she was. Not only that, but her body was flawless. I kept turning her over in the bed, saying to her, “Where are your wrinkles? Where are your saggy bits? I don’t see any!”
She actually thought it was funny, and said, “Who do you think you’ve been fucking? An OLD person?”
Now, as if this weren’t enough of a great time, the next day I got a text message from this classy young lady THANKING ME FOR A WONDERFUL TIME and telling me, “it was worth being tired today!”
Ok, she’s gorgeous. Her body is perfect. She’s funny as hell. She’s great in the sack, and she has the class to say “thank you” the next day.
So was it any wonder, once I got back to the States, that I text her an offer for a special birthday present: I’d fly her out to LA to visit me for ten days.
Less than 24 hours later, she text me back with an unreserved and resounding “yes”.
Little did I suspect just how much this amazing young lady would get to me, and how genuinely deeply we’d wind up connecting.
Coming up this week: Part II: welcome to Los Angeles, and “jag har vill din fitta!
video by jagvetej via YouTube
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"Now, not to brag..."
Then don't. Seriously.
Not impressed. Don't care.
I can't believe LAist is publishing this crap.
Oh wait. Maybe I stumbled onto a site with the Penthouse Forum rejects by mistake....
I would have been way too stupid for the Pippi reference. And reading. And breathing.
Seriously?
Seriously Ross, stop sucking your own wrinkled dick.
Good job on finding some st00pid 19 year old broad to sleep with you. Since you claim she's so smart, I'm sure she realized that HER birthday gift was to fly thousands of miles just to fuck an old man again. That's real cute.
Wow - I didn't think LAist could actually get worse after that arsehole Tony Pierce left, but this is complete shit. Unsubscribe.
I dont understand why you people are so angry about this story, its light funny and turns us all on. The only complaining should be that there is no picture of this swedish cutie... Thats Blog robbery
Eh. I've come to expect more from LAist than to continue printing this guy's garbage writing. Seriously - if it was funny, that would be one thing...or if it was thought-provoking (or even provoking), that would be another. But boring and self-involved? I can go sit at a bar and listen to a guy next to me ineloquently describe how he "banged this hot chick last night." Ross Jeffries, if you want us to continue reading your me-me-me posts, why don't you at least make them interesting?
Sjörövar-Fabbe farfars far,
är minsann en sjusärdles karl,
men han blir sjösjuk alla dar,
tjohej hadelittan lej.
RJ
93/93
This is what passes for journalism?
Just thinking about this for a moment ... I (including myself) have plenty of friends who have "hooked up" with A LOT of women, and have never felt the need to post such a misogynistic diatribe about our exploits, which leads me to believe that either (A) you are a sad virgin/loser who has a sad compulsive need to write about non-achieved (i.e. false) exploits, or (B) a very dangerous (i.e. destructive verging on rapist) DOUCHE (to coin the phrase of another poster) scavenger who has the fortune/misfortune of finding the "comfort" of mislead and easily exploitable young girls.
DUDE! Get your shit together! We are all in this "game" together. But when you come out, like you have, and essentially say that women/girls are just notches in your bed post, you give men (and especially single and available fun "guys") the uphill battle of arguing against the preconceived idea that women have that we are going to pillage/exploit/ruin them, and leave nothing but hurt, turmoil and regret in our wake.
Ladies, please understand, that this "man" is not a representative for us all. We (and I will be so bold to speak for men in general) respect you and want to "make friends."
Sincerely,
The last great gentleman
In a city completely overflowing with successful & beautiful women, some skeez thinks he's a big shot for bedding a child he has to import? What a waste of time it must be listening to him about 'seduction' when he resorts to duping kids from other countries... LA women already know this guy's a dirtbag.
He can't date women his age because they figured out that he's emotionally still only 19. Are you going to take her down near USC to get her a fake ID so you don't have to be the "creepy old man" at the juice bar and all-ages concerts for two more years?
Continue your ways buddy, and you will never know how amazing sex is when the woman really loves you.
Tucker Max. Eric Schaeffer. Done and done. Please, Zach. No more.
The most interesting commentary all weekend has been regarding this post -- how could it be such a bad, bad thing?
On a blog that averages over 20 posts each day, you've gotta expect a few posts that you're not into or would rather skip. Sometimes it's the ensuing discussion that makes the blogosphere so friggen awesome.
Rave and/or rant on!
Amazing. What knee-jerk responses from people who assume they know who I am or what I have to teach.
One of my mentors once said, "If you're not offending someone every day, you aren't putting out a strong enough message."
The quality of the responses, which amount to little more than insults and ad hominem attacks, show no original thought, indeed little thought at all.
Children, if the best you can do is call me "douche", or fling false stereotypes about my appearance, then the best you can do is not much better than calling me "kike" "sheeny" "hebe" "jew-boy" "hook-nose" "Christ-killer" etc. Same level of intelligence, same degree of thoughtfulness.
As it is, you guys are responding like 7 year-olds on a playground. Grow up and open your minds.
Peace and piece,
RJ
93/93 "Love under Will shall be the whole of the Law"
Jdoggy doggy spat thusly:
"...the uphill battle of arguing against the preconceived idea that women have that we are going to pillage/exploit/ruin them, and leave nothing but hurt, turmoil and regret in our wake."
Wow. What kind of damaged drama-queens are YOU encountering?
Part of what I teach in Speed Seduction(R) is to screen out such ladies, and screen for ones who are healthy, fun, adventurous, sexual, open to learning new things and new ways about pleasure, etc, without having to rely on traditional dating courtship rituals that you seem to hold sacred and beyond reproach.
You know, when you encounter something unknown, the temptation is to automatically compare it with what you DO know(or think you know), including your stereotypical encounters in the past.
Since you bring up "preconceived idea" I suggest you have a preconceived idea(or several of them)about how I teach my students to treat women.
Open your eyes, you might learn.
"Pernilla" was and is far from the women you describe; she is, in fact, whatever her tender age, one of the smartest, kindest, giving, strong-willed, adventurous, loving, good-natured, funny, tender people I've ever met, and nothing like the sad LA specimens you are describing.
I've have more to say about her in the next couple of blog posts, but for now, be assured, we both wound up genuinely adoring each other and I can't wait to see her again.
Now, do try to put your knee-jerk reactions on hold and look deeper into what I am ACTUALLY saying as opposed to what you believe you are reading.
Peace and piece,
RJ
"No one has time to understand your pathetic subtlety"...Gary Halbert
i decided to move my comments here because i'm sick of looking at that stupid camel humping picture on the other article. it conjures up images in my mind of what it must be like to have sex with this "man," RJ.
i don't think i really need to address why calling someone a douche is NOT like calling them an ethnic slur.
whoever made the comment about tucker max was right. if you're a man who wants to write about your sexual exploits, you should at least ensure that your writing is entertaining, funny, and compelling. your amateurish writing satisfies none of these requirements. if anything, the comments on these posts are better written and more thought-provoking than anything you're writing.
i can't wait for your next installation of "how a desperate man paid a barely legal girl to fly to LA so he could live out his dirty old man fantasies." if i took a big steaming DUMP on my computer i think it would have more literary and journalistic value than this crap.
Ok people, who the fuck cares so much? If you dont like it, then dont read it! anyway, RJ, post a damn picture
The reason there is so much commentary on this shite is because it is inflammatory, sexist, manipulative bullshit, NOT because it has something positive or interesting to offer. It's simply salacious crap written for the sake of being salacious, and frankly, it's not novel or different or representative of a "Los Angeles" specific viewpoint. I would be happy to write some kind of blog here in an exaggerated tone of man-hating Lorena Bobbitt-ensity where I advocated using men for dates or money and treated them as objects in a sick game. I'm sure it would get pages of blog comments and be "controversial" in the blogosphere. But such a column adds ZERO to LAist.com both in terms of advancing the quality of the site and in terms of representing the supposedly LA-centric theme of the site. What the fuck, guys? Seriously. I can get this from Tucker Max. I can get this from Leykis. I can get this from Neil Strauss.
I expect more from LAist, because you have previously shown that this is a site more interested in showing nuanced L.A. Please do not fall victim to the idea currently dominating the culture that the most obnoxious ideas that cause the loudest outcry are the most valuable.
Oh, and if you want a picture of RJ, just check out VajraMDR on match. He's solicited many of my friends with supposedly "earnest" messages. Nice to know the truth...
A dude nailing a hot 19-year-old and posting pictures of her: sure, we all like photos. Writing about it in a way that's compelling or funny or hot or detailing some human connection: awesome. ME nailing a hot 19-year-old: hell yes!
But this? I'm not sure if it's supposed to be making me jealous, or hot, or anxious to buy some magic cure-all with a registered trademark after it, but it's not working. All it's making me do is roll my eyes. What's this have to do with LA life? Why is it even here?
Anyway, freedom of speech is great, and so's the freedom to ignore. Please keep labeling those posts clearly, so I can keep skipping 'em. Thank you!
The funny thing is if there was less comments on Ross Jeffries' posts LAist would probably stop posting them. Negative or not, it gets hits, and that means more advertisers. If you really disdain his posts (as I can tell most do) don't even click on it and eventually he'll be talking about his "Speed Seduction (r)" exclusively on his MySpace account, with his only three friends.
Second ratpicnic. Shit, why did I post.
RatP,
Myspace? Nah, try me on Facebook. Just type in "Ross Jeffries" in the search box, My Facebook page rocks!
RJ
93/93
RatP,
Myspace? Nah, try me on Facebook. Just type in "Ross Jeffries" in the search box, My Facebook page rocks!
RJ
93/93
Oh, why you are at it, check out my profile on Match.com. My user name is VajraMDR. I'm sure the ladies on here will be creaming themselves!
Booooriiiing!
blatant offensive qualities aside, this has to do with LA because...?
hmm.
are you lying about your age on your match.com profile?
Ohmigod. I just looked at his facebook page. I need to take a shower now. He looks really skeevy.
RJ, the Regal Beagle called. Jack and Larry are out of pick-up lines and need your help.
HC,
Now that was fucking funny! Ha ha ha! At last, an original comment!
Congrats...you win a free 1/2 consult with me.
RJ
93/93
Utt73 blarted out:
"He can't date women his age because they figured out that he's emotionally still only 19. Are you going to take her down near USC to get her a fake ID so you don't have to be the "creepy old man" at the juice bar and all-ages concerts for two more years?"
Now, pay attention guys, because this is important. Utt's comments reveal some interesting and usually unchallenged ideas about how the entire men/women/sex/dating thing ought to work.
First and foremost, I thinking "dating" women of any age SUCKS. "Dating" is a horribly archaic, sloppy, socially-imposed set of rituals that usually only profits the entertainment, restaurant, gift industry, and those few folks who have the cash/status/good looks to make it work for them.
For men, dating is a form of gambling. Maybe you'll "get lucky".
Dating requires men to use one or more of the 5 B's:
Bullying
Begging
Buying
BS
Booze
So right out of the chute, Utt is still thinking in terms of a game I don't wish to play and that you smart guys don't have to play either if you know how to capture and lead a woman's imagination and emotions and screen for the women you truly desire.
In that case, dating is for women you are ALREADY SLEEPING WITH.
Did you get that, Utt?
Utt's second flub up is the notion that I have to go to some "location" to meet desirable women.
But it isn't about what location to go to. That's another hide bound, archaic idea.
It's about walking through the world in a way where your vibe is so attractive, you draw and attract women wherever you go.
As far as emotional age: I would say that one indication that someone has a relatively low level of maturity is that they have to resort to stereotypes and knee-jerk reactivity rather than thoughtful discussion.
Guys, there is nothing wrong at all with you saying "no" to current social rituals that turn you into a beggar, a bullier, a boozer, a bullshitter or a buyer.
Learn to use your vibe and your ability to capture and lead a woman's imagination and emotions and the "dating" will take place between the sheets. Where you go afterwards and what you do should be your choice.
RJ
93/93
"My Facebook page rocks"?
What are you...12?
...i dont get it. this is horrible writing.
Dear Penthouse,
I never believed it could happen to me...