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It's Sex Saturday! That means April Smear is going to post a rant or question about all things sex. Let’s create a dialogue and attempt to understand the sexual underbelly of Los Angeles!
I can’t even begin to think of how many times I’ve totally been into a guy and he can’t get the nerve to kiss me. It’s the same thing every time. Meet cute guy, realize connection, talk intimately for a long time, cuddle a bit, talk some more, then sadly go home. You see, right towards the end, after the cuddling, the guy needs to move forward and kiss the girl. This formula has been practically perfected to a science and should be carried out every time.
One can argue that the guy might not make the move because he’s nervous or afraid of rejection. Well, listen up guys. If a girl is talking to you for a long time and you touch her, say grab the knee or caress the shoulder, and she doesn’t shudder, than she probably likes you and wants to at the least make-out. If you know this, then it’s your responsibility to find the right moment to kiss her. How do you find the right moment? You don’t really need to. If the chick likes you, then she’ll ultimately create the moment and then all you have to do is reach over and play tongue hockey.
Now you may be thinking, “Well, why can’t the girl make the first move?” I mean, she can, if she wants. Some of us care, and some of us don’t. I’m a career driven woman that has to make major decisions all day. During my time of leisure, if I get the pleasure of being a cute man’s company, then I’d prefer if he’d take the slack off me so that I don’t have to make the first physical gesture. For me, the guy not making the first move is very telling of what my future 3-hour interaction or 3 year relationship with him will be like. If a guy can’t get the balls to kiss me now, then he definitely won’t be able to pull my hair during sex or put me in my place when I’m acting like a psycho bitch. To me, making the first move is synonymous to having a backbone.
The only time I sorta made the first move was when I was sixteen years old. I met this super hot wigger at a New Years Eve party and totally isolated myself in a corner to be with him. We talked and talked, he held my hand, but then wouldn’t kiss me. “I have a question to ask you,” I said. “Why haven’t you kissed me?” “I was going to wait until midnight,” he replied, “but I can definitely do it now.” Then we made-out hardcore well through midnight and into the early morning. Just the way I like it.
I understand that you don’t always have to get physical when you find a connection with a person. But, come on, you can’t deny how hot it is to make-out with someone you’re totally into. Why wait? Carpe diem, my friend. Making out and cuddling is a gift given to humans by God that should not be passed up. Next to exotic vacations, making out and cuddling are my next favorite things.
So if you’re a guy hanging out with a girl, and you feel the attraction is mutual, then go ahead, stop wasting time, and kiss her. You’ll open up a path to fun and pleasure, which is perfect because life is meant to be enjoyed.
Top photo by lempicki.maciek, bottom photo by zoic, both via Flickr
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Guys no longer make the first move because it's been beaten into our heads over and over again that if we make an unwelcome advance, we are basically rapists.
Not to be angry, but it seems women want the power to turn their heads, play Lucy with the football.
"During my time of leisure, if I get the pleasure of being a cute man’s company, then I’d prefer if he’d take the slack off me so that I don’t have to make the first physical gesture." Uh, guys have the slack to make the first move EVERY TIME, so maybe you should think of it that way. If you want to kiss somebody, just do it.
Brava! It's time someone reminded guys to sack up, quit whining and get back to being creepy (ie making the 1st move). Please tell my boyfriend I was kidding about being creepy, because seriously, if guys don't make the first move, I assume it's because they don't want me.
My point exactly!
No need to continue enforcing stereotypes, there should never be any "rules" to dating and relationships. Baaaaaa!
"If a guy can’t get the balls to kiss me now, then he definitely won’t be able to pull my hair during sex..."
Should hair pulling be discussed in advance, or is it cool just to go for it, like making the first move. Any guidance would be appreciated.
Grab her hair while making out. If she likes it, then she's down for hair pulling during boneage.