Hiking off Mulholland in Studio City: Fryman Canyon Park
The Wreckoning Is Coming at You: Inside the Trainwreck Studio
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Alice Cooper, Ace Frehley @ Nokia Theater 10/28/09
Found in L.A.: Medical Marijuana Ditched in the Curb
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Simply Wrong Food: IHOP's Holiday Pancakes
We're sure there's a special ring of hell specially reserved for Angelenos and their crazy-making ways. In fact, we're certain there is. We're so sure that we're launching a new semi-regular feature called "The Intolerables" that reimagines these folks as mythic super villains, worthy adversary of any superhero, who are destined to populate Hades and every other mythic universe.
Today, we're inspired by those folks who just cannot share. We're sure they were intolerable toddlers and have never grasped the concept that they live in a world populated by other people.
For example, look at this photo of a car parked at the Library Tower underground parking lot by a person who clearly never had siblings.
This person parks as if he's still an only child in a 10 bedroom house. Notice his inability to park within the lines of the parking stalls.
It reminds us of another spatially challenged Angeleno we observed on Wednesday in the Whole Foods parking lot at Fairfax and Third. Some wigger pilots his fly black and white Cadillac seville into a parking spot. No problem, except that home boy proceeds to overshoot his mark and parks his boat so that it takes up 1/3 of the parking spot in front of him, leaving some hapless mother of 6 who lives on south Fairfax with even less space to park in. For shame!
We imagine a special sort of limbo for this individual where he or she, subject to an incredible urge to urinate and in a hurry to park and pee, is forced to drive round and round a parking lot with plenty of spaces; however, these spaces are semi-filled by badly parked cars.
If we were to create an action figure for this type of LA idiot, we'd imagine him as a one-eyed wigger like Gary Oldman in "True Romance." We'd name him Nimrod Parker, outfitted in a white fur coat and cane.
He's all flash and no insight.
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Maybe the drivers were just trying to see how many notes they would get on their windsheild so they could blog about it. :)
If you see an expensive car parked over several spaces just key it. Although the person driving it will probably wonder why their car was keyed. Hopefully it will be a wake up call for them and they will be more careful about how they park their overpriced cars.
It's very hard to live South of Fairfax as it runs North/South. Besides, how many mom's of 6 can afford to shop at Whole Foods.
re poor women with children shopping at Fairfax Whole Foods. Since you're being so literal minded, I can vouch that i've seen plenty of poor women with lots of kids shopping in the Fairfax Whole Foods, especially as it shares the mall complex with KMart and Ross.
those poor women dont live south of fairfax. theyre bussed in from the east and they are actually nannies of rich jewish women who live in the area. ie thats why their children dont look all brown like a pinto bean but more like an egg noodle
As a libertarian, I don't support keying of cars or doing anything destructive to somebody else's property. I do, however, support lying in wait to get photographic revenge. That's what I did when some jerk peed in the bushes by my house, leading to that charming "my entire neighborhood is a men's bathroom" smell whenever it rains:
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2005/02/judge_for_yours.html
Note: NSFAWHPSAVSP (Not Safe For Anyone Who Has Problems Seeing A Very Small Penis)
Then there's this photo, of a woman who blocked the fire lane at the Starbucks on Mulhollland and Beverly Glen...for half an hour, while she and her ?grandson? got ice cream.
http://www.advicegoddess.com/archives/2004/11/the_most_import.html
To Amy Alkon - those photos are awesome! Great idea for payback. Did you confront these people? If so, I'd love to hear what they had to say for themselves.
Amy comes to the rescue again. You Rock!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/malingering/sets/72057594053049717/
More photos to make you angry about this, if you like.